Graveyard smash

Photos by Nick Tomecek

“Halloween Horrors” might be a haunted record.

I’m serious. But, I’ll get to that later.

The A-side of the 1977 album features a friendly male voice telling a spooky story on a stormy Halloween night. This already frightened me a bit because I don’t own many records with spoken word.

I felt as if I were listening to a creepy radio transmission from the past. “Warning, do not listen any further,” I could hear in my head.

Anyhow, the tale fit my photo shoot setting perfectly. Steven, the narrator, is on his way to Elm Hall Plantation, which he later describes as having many trees with Spanish moss. See the resemblance?

I don’t want to ruin the story, but if you haven’t heard it, you can find it on YouTube under “Story: Halloween Horror (1977).”

It wasn’t a pleasant tale, but things didn’t truly get scary until I flipped the record over.

The B-side features scary sounds such as screaming, moaning, creaking doors, banging, bubbling and more. I never made it to the “and more” part of that sentence.

During the windy sounds portion of the record, I heard a huge bang in my house. After jumping halfway across the living room, I realized a box in the closet had fallen.

I lifted the arm on my record player, slipped the record back in its case and hid it under other albums so I couldn’t see the green goop-style font reading “Halloween Horrors.” I had all the horror I could take for one night.

The back of the album cover reads: “With these sound effects, you can make your own Halloween Party. For best results, listen to this album in a dark room.”

Ha! No.

Tim Willi, the owner of FWB Vintage Records, set this record aside for me along with other Halloween-themed albums. While definitely a fun novelty find, thankfully he also dug up something a little tamer.

I swapped out the haunted record for a 7-inch vinyl featuring Bobby Pickett’s “Monster Mash.” This charming track, sung in the voice of Count Dracula, is my favorite Halloween song. Those who are familiar with the 1962 song will understand why there is only one appropriate way to describe this photo shoot with my photographer, Nick Tomecek.

It was a graveyard smash.

The outfit:

Dress - Magpie's Jewelry

Boots - Xhiliration, Target